I love holidays and, admittedly, go overboard sometimes, so thought I’d check before following my desire to share the happiness.

Is it okay to give my new (male) boss (I’m female) a Valentine?

 

Probably it isn’t okay to do this. Valentine’s Day has a sentimental component to it, so even if you find a humorous “boss” card, it still could feel uncomfortable to him. In a random survey conducted among area businesses, Valentines are not, nor have they been, part of the workday or workplace culture. Instead share your fondness for the day with your parents, siblings, and very close friends where exchanging typical V-Day messages is more comfortable and appropriate. By all means, wish him a Happy Valentine’s Day at some point on the 14th, but leave it at that.

 

We were out with another couple and had dinner at a Mexican restaurant. One of them had hard shell tacos, as I did, but ate hers with a knife and fork. I always thought it was okay to pick them up and eat them with one’s hands, but didn’t want to seem boorish so followed the knife and fork route, which was messy. Which is correct? What about quesadillas?

 

Tacos are meant to be eaten with the hands, because it is impossible to cut into the crisp shell with a knife and fork without having it crumble and crack, as you discovered. Soft shell tacos are more easily eaten with utensils than are hard shells, if someone feels awkward eating with his or her hands. Any filling that falls out, when you pick up your tacos to eat them, should be eaten with a fork, not scooped up with your fingers. Quesadillas are generally cut in triangular wedges and eaten with the hands, unless you love to add sour cream, guacamole or salsa, in which case a fork is your best bet.

 

I’ve been dating a woman for three months and am in a quandary about what to do for Valentine’s Day. We have a pretty close relationship but have never talked about it or our feelings for one another. I’m thinking I could give her a great present and card that describes how I feel about her but am a little nervous about doing that because I’m not sure how she feels. But I don’t want to just ignore the day, either. What should I do?

 

Well, you probably have some pretty good guesses about how she feels, and if you sense she shares your feelings then you could use Valentine’s Day to take the next step and make known whatever your sentiment toward her is. If you aren’t sure, then you might consider taking her to dinner, and/or giving her flowers, instead of putting your feelings in writing. It’s often best to express your thoughts verbally first, so she has a chance to tell you that she reciprocates them, without putting her on the spot with a romantic card or gift, in case she doesn’t.

 

Questions for Catherine? Send them to catherine.michaels33@gmail.com